Reading this from dear hannie's blog made me feel all nostalgic again. Looking at those stupid pictures i drew during every single lesson besides english and lit, the both of us managing to pass our o's was nothing short of a heaven-sent miracle.

But looking at it all in its full technicolour detail makes me feel like laughing again, although it probably seems completely nonsensical, sometimes bordering on major innuendos and super-random crap. Were we really that bored, i wonder. I guess what i remember most is:

• Hannie and me doing up a meticulous, highly detailed, 3-page career-plan chart, starting from a french-fry fryer at mac's and slowly working our way up the corporate ladder. Cuz we were pretty sure all our lessontime doodling would end up in F9s for o's. Thinking back, all the time we spent drafting such career plans could be used to actually pay attention for once.
• LIM BEY BEY. Who could ever forget her and her sexy one-pitch voice and suggestive smiles.
• The crazy Bangla Club. Where we all spoke in convincing Bangla accents 24/7.
• And our band, Pooja and the Flying Doves. With our very own theme song and back-up dancers wriggling their hips away during lessons.
• The horrible R21 story about KK+MM, still in that small notebook of jolie's.
• And the horrible R21 couple - jolie and nessa. With jolie cradling her ermmm, ample assets lovingly, while singing tenderly to them. ROFL.
• Our gang. =) Gossiping away during chinese lessons, and occasionally stopping to hear good old ah heng talk about her heyday when she was flooded with suitors. And her dramatic elopement with her Christian Boy.

I miss my crazy sitting partner too! Those madcap days in our classroom next to the smelly longkang. With our empty goldfish bowls, still filled to the brim with water and seaweed, perched precariously on the speakers above the whiteboard. Just to give the impression of a class pet, which were all mercilessly killed by us and probably the high altitude.

Sometimes i wish i can go back to those insouciant convent-school days. I guess going off to jc made us all grow up alot, which is unavoidable, but sometimes i think i'd rather remain in Neverland where things aren't so complicated and emotions are never in a tangle and people are more what-you-see-is-what-you-get. But having said that, jc's a different rollercoaster of experiences all over again, and i won't miss it for anything too. =) Why does every single entry here have an emo rant. I guess i only blog when i'm have emotions huh, or else i would be stoning/watching yuan dian, when i don't need emotions, just my EYES, all the better to see with. =D

Anyway. Although co camp was around a week ago, i couldn't resist putting this up, from our nightwalk.

IT'S SUPER FREAKY RIGHT. To me, at least. That's my bloodified, raw-skin-like hand - me and bixia perfecting our Tale of Two Sisters act. Thinking back, i feel so brave. =D I usually get goosebumps just looking at the deserted third floor of the science lab block in the day. but that night, at the ungodly hour of 3am, i actually managed to be there in the dark, under a table covered with red cloth, with candles glowing eerily around, while I soaked my hand in ice-water and grabbed people's legs.

That's junhong with his glow-in-the-dark face paint. Its looks like cucumber clay mask in the light. But in the dark...





Look closely. Imagine walking in the pitch blackness and suddenly seeing a small, glowing, disembodied face grinning at you.

Its the stuff horror movies are made of, i tell you. =D

Oh well. Back to the books.

my life has been terribly interesting of late.

finally, being at home all day means i'm able to be a huge couch potato and now i'm hooked unto the 7pm channel 8 show, yuan dian, just when it's about to end. so i'm hooked unto watching the beginning of it on youtube. and i'm hooked unto the show in particular cuz, besides the quite-interesting plot, i'm quite hooked unto shaun chen and lin yu zhong. and this is the first time in a million years i'm actually hooked unto a local drama, i feel like a bored housewife with nothing better to do. before i know it, i will be going to video-ezy to rent auntie-type 100-plus-episode dramas like zhen qing and pi li huo (remember them?), and spend my days plucking towgay in front of the tv.

the thing is, i have alot of better things to do e.g. studying for jcts which is in two sickening weeks, but i'm not doing them. i'm just watching my yuan dian, and sleeping often and at ungodly hours. and this irregular sleep cycle is driving my biological clock wild, so i'm breaking out disgustingly, and at this very moment i can feel a megagargartuan zit erupting.

the only highlight of my exciting life is co gathering today. supposedly, three generations of comm people, but only a handful of the first 2 generations turned up. the girls shopped while the guys arcade-d, like usual; we all had a bit of a gossip, like usual, and then took full advantage of cartel's after-9 discount on cakes, and ordered one of each type. =) ultimate sin. oh, and plus the free bread.

and i'm just too bored to do anything but blog about my highly glamourous life. becoming a bona fide auntie, getting breakouts, and then getting fat. no, fatter. plus the fact that i'm about to screw a levels up, in about 20 years' time, i can so imagine myself, how wonderfully glam.





OKAY LA. that's it. i will NOT touch my computer tomorrow. i will drape the anti-dust cloth over it to prevent the tempting lure of the blank monitor begging to be switched on. i will study for my jcts, so that even if i become a fat mor-peng auntie, i'll be rich enough to afford a vip membership to video-ezy and a home theatre system, and stop watching shaun chen from the annoying blurry tiny youtube screen.

freedom is, surprisingly, getting to me. i feel like such a slob, waking up at almost 12 everyday, sleeping the afternoon away, and then eating and returning to bed again. guess the sleep debt i accummulated over the past 3 months or so is finally being paid off. and i'm too lazy to get much studying done - just spent hours clearing my megaenormoushugegargartuan pile of notes, which was quite an accomplishment, considering i spent the past few days on a couch potato tv marathon. looking at the work i have not done, i'm quite sure to flunk my jcts with flying colours.

oh. my a's too.

oh well, i guess i kind of got over my anger, cuz maybe it's really not worth getting highly strung over this. let people say whatever they want, i don't really care anymore. in fact, in my current state of mind, i don't really care about anything else already, but my impending doom in 19 days' time. all that drama's over.

sigh. i just wish i was there for the final heart-to-heart with the comm girls, instead of outside for another heart-to-heart. dunno, i just feel it's our last opportunity to really talk, and i missed it. =( people come and go into your life really quickly, i realise. and some might have left a long time ago already, just that i was too blind to see.

okay la. enough emo-ing and regretting. guess the prospect of spending the next 19 days, and the next 5 months, in a mind-numbing state of mugging is making me reallyreallyreally sian. and being stuck at home in front of the tv, getting fat on nutella and pringles, and the most interesting event happening to me is watching a certain hot guy get booted from campus superstar - this life is getting to me. i miss being in a madcap rush.

co camp over, hustings over, new comm announced, and somehow i feel a bit sad. in a way, i keep thinking, if i could turn back time, perhaps i would have really done a better job. but oh well, i did my best and i'm happy to be free again. and i'll miss everyone. okay. certain people.

oh well. more cryptic entries that no one would understand but me. somehow blogging is an emotional catharsis for me, quite unlike the usual event-logging kind of blogging. but i think no one reads this but me, so it's okay. its just for venting.

people always tell me i'm too nice, and that's a very dangerous thing to be. but i never saw it that way, until recently. it was like slapping me, reminding me that this world is not as simple as i always assumed it to be. all along, i thought it very logical that as long as you're nice to people, people will be nice to you too. i guess not. its not just one single incident. its a string of lessons in a row.

it may not be a really huge thing, but i didn't do anything to you. i wasn't even that close to you, for goodness sake. maybe i'm not much good at many things, but i'm sure of one thing - if i don't have anything good to say, i won't say it. i'm not like certain people who talk alot and act smart but every single word that comes out from their mouth is pure gibberish. so i don't deserve that bit of bitching from you.

and i swear i HATE it when people gossip about me when they don't know any effing thing about my life. at least get the facts right before you start gossiping, cuz you don't know when it can escalate into something bigger, like it just did. seriously, GET A LIFE, instead of talking about mine.

and some things really confuse me now. i guess all along, i just listened to everything from your side, and i believed you. now i'm not sure what, or who to believe. and i'm even sure whether i want to know the truth now. it's supposed to be in the past, so i should just forget about it - its just that it keeps coming back, over and over again. i guess i just want to know what really happened, but i don't know how, or if i should. i guess sometimes all this just reminds me how hard it is to trust someone.

people can be such imbeciles.